Addressing the Rotten-Apple-People Problem

Rotten apples – negative, destructive, self-absorbed, unethical employees – pollute organizations.

Furthermore, foul leaders inevitably build stagnant, foul organizations. Worse yet, passive leaders – those who tolerate rotten apples – create rotten environments by default.

Leaders who tolerate rotten apples are rotten themselves.

Facebook contributors discuss: “One bad apple spoils the whole bunch, true or false?” (5/3/13)

Spotting:

You don’t need a study to determine if your culture sucks.

1. People use blind copies in email.
2. Gossips win.
3. Territorial managers stake out and protect turf.
4. Leaders live in ivory towers.
5. Competition is about winners and losers not performance.
6. Getting by is the goal.
7. Smiles and laughs are rare.

Your culture sucks if people don’t love working in it.

Solving:

Organizational culture is simply the way you do things – how people treat each other. Yesterday, a Leadership Freak contributor suggested social contracts. KaPow!

Social contracts say you’re serious
about the way you do things.

Social contract:

We will:

1. Address issues in the smallest context possible. Dirty laundry is kept in the laundry room.
2. Expect you to connect with colleagues and teammates.
3. Take responsibility to improve things we don’t like.
4. Pursue the best interests of all parties, always.
5. Call you out if you let others down.
6. Speak candidly with compassion.
7. Forgive offenses that are acknowledged and addressed.

We won’t:

1. Say one thing to your face and another behind your back.
2. Tolerate posturing and puffing behaviors.
3. Lie, ever.
4. Blow up.
5. Hold grudges.
6. Have secret agendas.
7. Complain without bringing solutions.

Consequences:

Violating our social contract is grounds for warnings, corrective action, and dismissal, if necessary. You might be sent to our, “Be Nice,” class for social delinquents.

Enforcement:

Everyone is authorized to point out violations of social contracts, regardless of position or tenure.

More: Connecting Through Social Contracts.

What would you include in an organizational social contract?

The Secret to Defeating Manipulators

Don’t get played.

Cowards, manipulators, and backstabbers encourage you to take risks so they don’t have to. They posture in shadows. Let others get dirty. They step into the light when it’s safe.

Leading requires risk-taking. Don’t lead if you can’t take responsibility. Backstabbers and players, on the other hand, manipulate leaders. They want benefit while others take risks.

Players and manipulators always drive toward self-interest, secretly. Even when making others look bad, its to strengthen their own position.

Exposing manipulative players:

Ask ten questions to see if you’re being played.

1. Are you being asked to keep secrets?
2. Is someone creating paranoia and weakening relationships?
3. Has someone whispered negative information about another in your ear?
4. Who’s in the loop? Who’s left out?
5. Whose life gets easier? Whose gets harder?
6. Why is it important for you to take the lead, rather than someone else?
7. Who looks good if it works?
8. Who takes the fall if it fails?
9. How is the team impacted?
10. Are you functioning within organizational values?

Bonus: Who’s doing the work? Manipulators maneuver others into doing most of the work.

Defeating manipulative players:

All organizations have players and backstabbers who place self-interest ahead of all other interests. They thrive in silence and secrecy.

Silence implies permission.

Secrets strengthen manipulators.

Openness and transparency defeat manipulative players. Don’t attack them. Don’t play their games. Open the shades. Turn on the lights. Watch them fall in line or scurry like cockroaches.

Performance wins when everything’s on the table.

Transparency defeats manipulators.

When you smell the stench of manipulation, invite all stakeholders to a meeting that spells out all deliverables, responsibilities, deadlines, and communication channels. Don’t waste time attacking manipulators. It’s a distraction. Create high performance cultures with transparency.

How can leaders lessen the power of manipulators?

The Five Powers of Permission

Old styles of leadership are about giving permission to supplicants. Followers seek permission. It’s an “I/you” rather than “we” dynamic. Leaders have power while followers ask.

I/you leadership is disengaging and disempowering.

Successful leaders do more than give permission, they get it. Permission answers the question, “Is it ok with you if we talk about something?”

Five Powers of Permission:

1.  “May I …” builds trust.
2. “Would it be ok if …” shares power.
3. “Do you mind if …” equalizes social status.
4. “Could we discuss…” prevents stagnation. Permission moves the agenda forward when topics are awkward.
5. “Is it ok with you, if…” engages.

Permission opens doors, protects relationships, and prevents stagnation.

Ask permission to:

1. Bring up uncomfortable topics. Set a date for the conversation.
2. Explore progress.
3. Correct. “May I …”
4. Challenge.
5. Give feedback.
6. Say what you see. “Is it ok if I share something I see …”

Four responses to NO:

When permission isn’t granted? Ask:

1. How business-critical is the topic?
2. Is there a deeper issue to address?
3. Can you let it go?
4. Must you address it, regardless?

When topics are mission critical, say, “We need to talk about this soon.”

Just a courtesy:

Isn’t asking permission just social courtesy? Yes, sometimes it is. But, social courtesies smooth and protect. Perhaps you prefer to be discourteous and abrasive?

Four reasons leaders don’t ask permission:

1. Arrogance. It’s too humbling to ask and too easy to tell.
2. Fear of seeming weak.
3. Fear of losing power.
4. Authoritarian rather than relational leadership styles.

What does permission-leadership look like in your world?

What are the pros and cons of permission-leadership?

How the Need for Fairness Destroys People

The need for fairness prevents
people in the middle from reaching the top.

Every organization of any size has slackers, drifters, and fence sitters. Top management should deal with them, but sometimes they don’t.

It’s not fair that you give 100% while they give 75%, or less. The need for fairness whispers in your ear,

“Why should you work harder than others?”

Don’t listen! Doing less is the path to mediocrity and self-defeat. The path to personal growth is taking on new responsibilities and challenges not shirking the ones you have.

Organizations that don’t reward hard
work, reward game-players and office politicians.

Continue working hard and seek new employment, transfer to another department, wait for the boss to die, but don’t become a drifter, whatever you do.

Politics vs. work:

Every successful leader understands and plays office politics, sometimes. I’m not talking about backstabbing and gossip. I’m talking about understanding the real organizational versus the official organizational chart, for example. On the other hand, hard work always applies.

Hard work:

Be the hardest worker in your office. Don’t destroy your health, neglect other responsibilities, or stay late every night. But, always bring it.

Reject the voice that says, “It’s not fair that you’re working harder than others.” Momma says, “Life isn’t fair.” She’s right. Overcome the self-defeating need for fairness.

How can people in the middle overcome the temptation to pull back because they’re working harder than others?

How to Quickly End Useless Meetings

More lying happens in meetings than any other place in your organization. Most lies are lies of silence.

In meetings, silence isn’t consent, its cowardice, self-interest, manipulation, or political expediency. Honesty, more than anything else, transforms meetings. Truth-telling ends useless meetings.

When there’s more honesty in the “meeting after the meeting,” excellence is a myth.

Meetings apart from honesty are:

1. Driven by personal agendas.
2. Scripted frustration.
3. Fake affirmations of weak leadership.

Robert Herbold, former C.O.O of Microsoft, told me, “Many meetings are useless religious ceremonies controlled by highly organized, meaningless ritual after meaningless ritual.” I wrote, “Polite Meetings Are a Waste of Time” after our conversation.

Great agendas apart from honest participation
are well oiled exercises in futility.

Jay Elliot, former Sr. V.P. of Apple, shocked me when he said they had lots of meetings at Apple and they were useful. I’ve come to appreciate well run meetings, even if they are rare.

New Beginnings:

Great organizations have great meetings.

1. Honest participation begins with leaders. They won’t be honest if you aren’t. Point out elephants in the room. Share your missteps. Seek real solutions. Challenge the status quo.
2. Honor honesty. The next time a thorny issue is raised, thank the person who raises it. If you punish them, everyone learns the expediency of silence.
3. Success depends on chairpersons who keep everyone focused and who move conversations toward action items.
4. Agree on and define problems before discussing solutions.
5. Invite participation with short agendas. Long agendas silence discussion.
6. Identify imperfect next steps. Forget perfect solutions. Small steps are better than no steps. Excellence is never a destination.
7. Assign responsibility and establish deadlines. “Who does what by when?”

Bonus: The goal of all meetings is doing what’s best for the entire organization, not simply your division.

See contributions on my Facebook page.

What do effective chairpersons do?

How are useful agendas created?

Overcome the Dangers of Office Politics

Unethical office politicians create perceived threats. They’ll suggest someone is out to get you. “Watch out for Joe!”

Vulnerability to unethical office politicians occurs when you wrongly believe they’re acting in your best interest. In reality, they’re working for themselves.

I’ll never forget a colleague saying how sorry they felt for our boss. “She thinks I’m her friend.” they said. In reality they were manipulating rather than supporting the boss. On another occasion, they said, “I can cut someone and they’ll bleed to death before they realize what happened.”

The genius of unethical office politicians is their ability to
make you think you’re acting for your benefit when you’re acting for theirs.

Defensiveness:

The goal of unethical office politicians is defensiveness on your part. Playing defense distracts from good offense. Rather than working to create new success, defensiveness causes you to protect current positions and past achievements.

It’s hard to move in positive directions when you’re in CYA (Cover Your Ass) mode. You spin your wheels while they get ahead.

Defensive postures:

1. Drain creativity.
2. Focus on threats.
3. Include self-justifying language.
4. Undermine others.

Ethical office politics:

Office politics is real; understanding and playing office politics ethically advances careers.

1. Align with real power structures; influence influencers. People with power may not have official authorization. Decision-making seldom follows organizational charts.
2. Avoid offending unofficial leaders.
3. Never violate a confidence.
4. Learn personal agendas.
5. Respect what colleague’s value.
6. Deliver the goods, most importantly. There’s no substitute for performance.
7. Always act with the best interest of the organization in mind.
8. Avoid unnecessary gamesmanship.

Bonus:

Highly political environments – cronyism, favoritism, manipulation – are never cured from the bottom up.

How can leaders navigate office politics?

What strategies have you seen office politicians use?

Can Complainers Become Leaders

Are complainers potential leaders? Listen closely to their complaints; learn from their techniques. Seeing problems is the beginning of leadership; circling problems ends leadership.

Some see problems and complain;
leaders see problems and seek solutions.

Political Complainers:

The first time I met a political complainer I was twenty-five and leading a growing nonprofit.

She came representing the complaints of others.

In reality she wanted her own way. She overstated problems and ignored success. It didn’t matter that a dying organization had found new life.

Every organizational growth cycle produces political complainers who come representing others. Their power to gather followers is in compassion, real or fake.

Their power of influence is making
people feel they care and suggesting you don’t.

My experience indicates political complainers can devastate organizations. They pursue restoration of the past in the false hope that going back solves growth pains.

Growth causes pain. Compassionate people complain about change because change hurts.

Leadership ends when preventing discomfort becomes the ultimate goal.

Never let those who don’t like
what’s working change it.

Pit bull Complainers:

Unlike political complainers who represent others, pit bull complainers never let it go. Round and round you’ll go discussing the same issues over and over. Tenacity is their gift.

Questions to ask about complainers:

1. Can they go beyond pointing out problems?
2. Can compassion and tenacity be refocused?
3. Are they willing to create and execute solutions to the problems they see?
4. Are they willing to do what’s best for the organization?
5. Do they align with organizational values?
6. Is forward-facing possible?
7. Can they become loyal?
8. Can they find ways to talk about the future without complaining about the past?
9. Can they transition from pressuring you to achieving on their own?

Forward-facing solutions create momentum. Backward-facing complaints de-motivate.

Have you seen complainers become leaders?

How can complainers become leaders?

Talent is Never Enough

Adams and Jefferson, Founding Fathers of the United States, didn’t always like each other. Toward the end of their lives they came to appreciate and respect each other but for much of their political careers they were rivals. Jefferson’s skilled compromising skills offended a dogmatic Adams, for example.

They were at odds but they invested their lives in a shared mission.

Committing to shared mission
and vision binds talent together.

I constantly hear, “Find great talent.” But, fools think talent is enough. Leaders miss the point when they focus on talent and neglect shared mission.

Talent without shared commitment
is disruptive and dangerous.

Off target interviews:

Job interviews miss the target when they focus on what people have accomplished and neglect what they believe. Spend more time talking about organizational vision and values. Dig deep into belief systems. See if their eyes light up when you share your mission.

Shared mission:

1. Binds diverse people and groups together.
2. Builds connections where people respect each other even if they don’t like each other.
3. Enables a context where people rely on the performance of others.

Great talent strengthens organizations as long as everyone deeply commits to a shared mission. Apart from that, diversity is paralyzing chaos.

Don’t just tell me what you’ve done, tell me what you believe.

True believers:

Some are too good to deeply believe in an organization’s mission. They’re too talented, too smart, or too proud. They have their own agenda. They feel they lower themselves if they “drink the kool aid.”

“Company men” are looked down on by aloof elites. I’ll take a true believer with average talent over a disconnected hot-shot any day.

Talent is overrated – belief is underrated.

The leaders who founded the United States believed and because they did, they committed. These are the people who change things.

Successful Failure

Leaders who can’t fail won’t succeed because failure is essential to success. A world without failure is dead. Furthermore:

Leaders frequently fail at letting others fail.

Leaders who can’t let others fail:

1. Limit growth.
2. Hog tie innovation.
3. Sap confidence.
4. Live fearing the next failure; they’re control freaks.
5. Tend to blame rather than develop.

Hand-holding isn’t helping:

Help strengthens; hand-holding creates dependency. Pseudo-kindness motivated you to hold someone’s hand – protect or cover for them.

Hand-holding doesn’t strengthen it weakens.

For example, you’ve been constantly reminding someone of deadlines because they don’t follow-through. At first it was helpful. But, hand-holding enabled their weakness. Their weakness became your responsibility.

Carrying others isn’t good for anyone, over the long-term.

Frustration from covering incompetency motivates you to let go. Anger gives you the courage to do what you should have done long ago. Not healthy!

Fixing your failure:

Always work with your boss. Say:

1. I’ve been covering for someone’s weaknesses.
2. I thought it would help but it didn’t.
3. I see how I weakened the team.
4. I plan to let go. I hope they rise up but they may fail.
5. Do you have any suggestions?

At this point, the foolishness of hand-holding should be obvious. You blew it.

Five benefits of failure:

Trust: People who “never” fail can’t be trusted.  Trust people who fail and own it. Environments where failure is prohibited are filled with deception, posturing, and blame.

Growth: Failure points are often growth points.

People who can’t fail can’t grow.

Strength: Working through failure strengthens everyone.

Capacity: Strength from failure expands capacity.

Wisdom: Successful failure makes us wise, even if it’s just learning what doesn’t work.

The only reason to let someone fail is long-term benefit outweighs short-term risk.  Fail small.

 How do you know when it’s time to let someone fail?

How can leaders help others fail well?

See how Facebook readers answered: “Before you let someone fail _______.”

Destroy Silos Before They Destroy You

I asked an elected official to share his impressions of the political process. Without hesitation he said, “It’s disappointing that the Democrats and Republicans are sitting in separate rooms figuring out how to make the other party look bad. Politicians live in silos.

Silos are great for storing things but destructive to organizations.

Effective leaders always destroy silos.

Organizational silos:

1. Grow inward like incestuous families.
2. Isolate talent.
3. Hoard resources.
4. Slow progress.
5. Dampen enthusiasm.
6. Create paranoia.
7. Act in self-protective ways that damage others.
8. Don’t network.
9. Focus on individual good rather than organizational good.
10. Win when others lose.

Bonus: Silos resist change.

Silo Breakers:

Silo-breaking is painful and slow but can be done.

1. Form a clear picture of your organization without silos.
2. Define specific behaviors that enhance collaboration and break silos.
3. Hold cross-department planning meetings. Let them see the “enemy.”
4. Embrace decision-making by participants not isolated bosses.
5. Tell stories that honor collaboration and illustrate silo-breaking.
6. Reward teams and teamwork.
7. Develop leadership skills and attitudes that enhance collaboration.
8. Measure performance in terms of teams.
9. Seek best solutions regardless of the source.
10. Establish inclusive rather than exclusive systems.

Bonus: Embrace maximum transparency and information sharing.

Silos are slow, cumbersome, and destructive. Organizations with silos may win battles but eventually they collapse inward and lose the war.

What are the symptoms of organizational silos?

How would you being silo-breaking in your organization?

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