How to Disarm Your Inner-Critic
I live with an inner critic who loves pointing out my faults, failures, and shortcomings. I’m never good enough for that bastard.
How about you?
“In all my years of coaching, I have never worked with anyone who was not substantially sabotaged by a persistent Judge character… Your Judge Saboteur is your private enemy number one.” Shirzad Chamine, author of, “Positive Intelligence.”
Shirzad said, “The Judge Saboteur constantly finds fault with:
- Our circumstances.”
I’m so used to – comfortable with – his voice that I fear I couldn’t succeed without him. I mistakenly believe he drives me to success. But, my inner fault-finder never shows me the path to success and happiness. He yells, but he never yells, “Go Dan! You can do it.”
Discerning without judging:
What would I do if I didn’t judge – find fault – all the time? Wouldn’t I lose passion for excellence? Don’t I need the judge?
Shirzad says we should discern rather than judge. “Discernment is paying attention to the state of things as they are…”
Shirzad suggests we watch for persistent emotions like anxiety, resentment, or frustration. It’s likely your judge is at work.
As I write this, my inner-critic is yelling, “You’ll never be rid of me.” I’m not judging him; I’m observing him and he doesn’t like being observed. He prefers that I judge him.
Shirzad suggests we observe and label our Judge Saboteur. I’m calling my Saboteur, “Bastard.” I’m not angry at him – he loves my anger. He hates the light.
Not your friend:
Your inner-critic isn’t your friend. He never enhances relationships. He never enhances happiness or satisfaction. He believes satisfaction is a dangerous enemy; you don’t deserve satisfaction.
Freedom from the Judge enables investigation, curiosity, and the joyful, passionate pursuit of excellence.
What label might you give your Judge Saboteur?
What strategies does your inner-critic employ?
Recommended reading: “Positive Intelligence”